These are questions I have scribbled in my design book, and questions I'm pondering that I need to find the answers for to express mechanically in a way that feels right.

How do I determine the soulmate's gender? Sexuality? Romantic orientation? How do I determine if the soulmate loves the player romantically? How do I determine what the soulmate wants, if that is determined separately from whether the player and soulmate "connect" enough?

The motivations for a player who is not interested in the soulmate they are assigned by fate: Assembling an identity, in contrast to destiny (how do I make this mechanically interesting?), build a future using cards during the Courting Period? Is there a meaningful difference between cards that are shared with soulmate and ones which are not? What is that difference, and how can it be distinct without shitting on either romance/soulmates or aromanticism/not being compatible with a soulmate/choosing non-romance?

I've got courting mechanics that I like, but these are important things to figure out in order to really make the game I want: a game of choices, and identity, and interacting with fate, either to follow it, or reject it, or grab it and craft it to your will.